I am beyond thankfully there are many other Mommies, besides myself, experiencing Mommy Guilt and are willing to share it! Some of my favorite Mommy Guilt responses were: having to leave your child at the bus stop because you couldn't take them to school, traveling for work (but kinda enjoying the break away from it all), ignoring their nighttime calls (for water or another hug/kiss) because of exhaustion and need for quiet time, letting the T.V. babysit your oldest while the youngest and you nap (FYI: this particular Mommy is 8 months pregnant with an almost 5 year old and 3 year old--hey, no judgement from me), having to drop your oldest off at school while the younger two get quality Mommy time at home, and the coffee before anything else in the morning came up time or two.
Well, I hear ya Mommies! Phew. This Motherhood thing is tough. Just remember, as one Mommy who responded pointed out to me, Good Mommies feel guilt because they are thinking of their children first. That comment made me feel a bit better and I hope it does the same for you.
Well, thanks again for sharing. I urge you continue to share something new every Monday with me.
Speaking of sharing...I'll start...
(1) I feel Mommy Guilt when I tell little white lies to Reese. They are little (which makes them harmless right?) and usually for her own good or to divert a meltdown, so I do it. For example, while Reese was at M.D.O today I decorated my house for Fall. Man I love Fall. Totally off the subject, but it's true. Anyways, so I made a "Candytropolis"--or at least that's what I'm calling it. Basically I decorated my entire dining room table with containers of Halloween candy. See what I mean.
It seems like a bad idea--building a "Candytropolis" with a 20 month old living in the house--right? Well, I've always wanted to make one of these and since I had the time today I did it and without really thinking about Reese wanting to eat all of this candy. So, when she came home today I almost immediately heard her squeal at the sight of all this colorful goodness. To tell ya the truth Reese hasn't experienced much candy in her short life, so to her it could have looked like colorful (anythings) sitting on the table. I used her lack of candy knowledge to my advantage. I said, "Oh yes! Aren't those pretty? Look at all those colors! We can smell them, but we can't taste them." (LIE! LIE! LIE!) I let her smell a few (which didn't actually have a fragrance) and then put her down. She smiled and ran off to the other room. In her absence do you think I did nothing but smell these pieces of candy? No! I'll confess--as soon as she ran out of the room to play with her toys in the living room--I devoured a mini Butterfinger, a mini Twix, and a mini Milky Way bar (the key word here is "mini" people) and all this happened before she had a clue what was going on.
Man! I am going to bed tonight with a load of guilt for doing this, but it was sure tasty. Plus, my blood sugar was low. It was medically necessary.
(2) I have Mommy Guilt when Reese doesn't know how to do something. Of course, I know, there's ALOT she isn't able to do yet because she isn't developmentally ready for it, but that's not the "stuff" I'm talking about. Ok, let's see...for example, I took Reese in for her 18 month check up and the nurse asks, "Can Reese stack at least 3 blocks on top of each other?" I say, "We have blocks at home, but she's not that interested in playing with them, so Ummm...I'm not sure." (In my head I'm thinking--I should be encouraging her to play with blocks more! I wonder if she can stack 3 blocks?) Or how about the time when we were eating lunch with another little girl Reese's age who ate applesauce with a spoon--extremely well I might add. (In my head I'm thinking--I should have introduced her to a spoon sooner! I shouldn't be so worried about her making messes with utensils--after all that's the only way she's going to learn! Bad Mommy!) I'm not really this crazy about Reese's development. She's going to learn some things faster than others and some things at a slower pace and that's fine by me. I just can't help but feel like it's something I'm doing or not doing when she hasn't mastered a certain skill that most can do.
Does anyone else ever feel like this?
(3) The last Mommy Guilt reveal for the day has to do with the way Reese eats. See, Reese used to eat really well. She ate a variety of foods and a lot of them. Well, the older she gets the more resistant she's become towards food. This is a normal stage for toddlers--I know-- and she's exerting some of her independence, but it's still frustrating at times. Here's the thing: I don't push food. I refuse to. When she says, "All done" almost immediately after starting a meal I respond with, "Make sure you get enough, because we're not eating again until (x, y,z)." I don't want to encourage her to clean her plate, because I want her to have control over her eating in some regards. If she's not hungry--she shouldn't be forced to eat just because it's dinner time. I still feel she's a good eater, just not the great eater she once was.
Figuring out what to pack for Reese's lunches has been interesting since her M.D.O. is a "peanut free zone." I was asking around about what lunch items would be good to eat cold--besides a PB & J and lunch meat (which Reese doesn't always care for). Someone suggested chicken, so we stopped at Chick-fil-a and picked her up some nuggets. I packed them for her in today's lunch and apparently she loved them and ate everything else really well, too. One of the teachers was telling me how well she liked her chicken nuggets today and as I'm smiling I'm thinking Shhhh! Don't be so loud! I don't want the other mothers to hear that I packed fried chicken in my child's lunch today! Oh, well you do what works.
Like what worked today (for me) was buying these mini Red Velvet cupcakes.
If you look closely the package says these are "Two bite" cupcakes. I assure you this must be a misprint, because I inhaled one of these mini cupcakes in a single bite. Do you see a theme in this blog post? I do, too! I have a sweet tooth. I may need help with my sugar addiction. I use sweets as a survival tool for Motherhood.
And no--I am not pregnant.
The end.
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